Namrata’s Secrets by Rathin Bhattacharjee
“I told him that my marriage was fixed and that I wasn’t gonna be a pain in the a– anymore. But before we called our relationship quits, I just wanted to meet him for one last time. I wanted him to make love to me for old time’s sake..” She uttered in a cracking voice. She was clearly in great pain.
“Do you have to continue with your narrative now, Ma?” Sujata couldn’t help asking her mother, sitting on a chair by the side of her bed as she was.
“I do. I know my time is up, dear. I won’t be here tomorrow. But I don’t wanna die with the guilt of these sins weighing heavily on my chest till my end. Besides, I don’t want you to pay the price for your mother’s sins..”
Sujata then stood up and having bent over the sprawling body, carefully wiped away the tears in the eyes of her mother with a tissue as Namrata continued :
“I’d murdered him that same night in the act of love making, ensuring in the process that there’re no clues left behind. I let my dad know to his utter delight the next day that I was willing to marry the man of his choice.” Namrata heaved a sigh and continued :
“I got married to Samir …..,” She looked intently at her daughter before adding, “……your Baba, within the next couple of weeks. He’s, like my dad said, a gentleman to the core. I’d discussed the problem of tying the knots with a complete stranger with a close relative time and again before the wedding. So, I knew I’d to act taciturn at least in the first few years of our married life. Samir was a good man. A dreamer, he thought that the world was a heavenly place. On our first night together, just before getting under the blanket, he told me that he’s a virgin. I’ve already told you about all that. What I didn’t know was how our first night was a complete failure. He was a novice while my previous lover…okay, let me rephrase it like all my previous ones, made me an expert.
You happened within a year of our marriage. Not surprising either, considering the kind of life I led. Your Baba’s cup of happiness was therefore, filled to the brim. The years passed hassle-free. You got yourself admitted to the University later. Landed with a job in your final semester. That’s when I thought it’s time to tell Samir about my past.
The look in his eyes after the revelation, you ought to have seen to believe it! It’s as if he was struck by lightning or had seen an alien for the first time in his life! He started behaving very badly with me… to the extent of even torturing me from then on. I had joined a new company by then. Both you and I were earning good money. I knew that I had nothing to fear from Samir any more.
So, whenever he was railing at me for my past or upbringing, I’d pay him back in the same coin. Tit for tat. You thought he was mean to me. You started taking my side in our fights. You called him names and asked me how I could put up with all his monstrosity.
Once I knew that I’d been able to implant that kind of hatred in you, I began to relax waiting for him to take the first steps.
He did. He fell into my trap and the day…the day he became wild, bemoaning our marriage, questioning my character – you thought you had killed him with that hammer at first , didn’t you? I had seen that look of dread in your eyes when you came back to your senses. Did you notice how the iron head of the hammer was wrapped with a cloth?
I had readied it beforehand. With cottons and scrape bandage. But even in my wildest dreams I could not imagine my plan working out to a T like the way it did!
When you charged at your father wildly, in trying to defend himself, he had pushed you back to the wall. As the back of your head hit the wall, you tumbled down senseless …your eyes closed.
Having seen you fall feebly like that, I became berserk and having grabbed the hammer with the long wooden handle, I struck at your father’s head with all my might from behind. Just one blow on the temple or wherever it might have landed! He was gone in an instant without so much as letting out a sound! The miserable man, who was bending over your inert body, whimpering, never knew what had hit him…”
Namrata paused to ask for a sip of the coffee from the stool beside her bed to perch her dry lips before continuing with her narrative while her daughter, Sujata, got up from the chair opposite and put down the cup along with the saucer with an indecipherable look on her face!
“By the time you came back to sense, I had chalked out my next move. So, it was hard for me to make you believe that your father’s death was nothing but an accident and why that had to be kept hidden from the nosy parkers. God! How we two drove for nearly three hours in the wintry night to leave his naked, dead body – sans his ring, his watch, sans everything – on the desolate rail lines!
When I heard the news on the TV about the unidentified body of a man shredded to pieces by the train, the anxiety that had been killing me internally since then, was finally gone.”
She was suddenly taken by a bout of coughing. Sujata noticed the first trickle of blood down the corners of her Ma’s lips. She didn’t hurry out or call the nurse! Whether it was due to the shocking narrative or the fact that the doctor had warned her about the end from the first day itself – is best left at the reader’s discretion.
Just then Namrata opened her eyes laboriously, trying to search for her daughter before placing them on Sujata’s face.
“I knew that after the initial shock and trauma, you’d be all right and carry yourself as per the need of the hour. You proved me right. But for the hiccups here and there, our secrets have stayed with us. I’m so proud of you, Su…..”
“For the next few weeks, we played the part of a bereaved family to perfection, remember?” She smiled feebly before continuing. “Once the police stopped bothering us, we heaved a sigh of relief. Both of us started leading a normal life again. But I wasn’t. I never had been, since the visit to the Doc’s. Beneath the calm exterior, I had started counting my days knowing full well they were numbered…”
Namrata, lying in that white-sheeted bed, was breathing heavily now but she knew that there was not much time left to complete her story to her only child, Sujata, she had to. So, with her right hand held over her daughter’s, she went on, “ I’ve always been rash and this flaw in me drove me on from one sin to another. I thought that the world was foolish and no one was going to be any wiser about how scheming I had been all my life in carrying out my devilish acts, one after another.”
She became still then with her eyes closed. For a moment Sujata feared the worst. She dabbed around Namrata’s lips and mouth with the handkerchief in her hand for the spilled over blackish trickle. Sujata was terrified by the pathetic change in her Ma in bed. She had always looked upon her mother as the best of everything in the world! Truth is said to be stranger than fiction, but she was never prepared for this harsh reality! She dashed to the door, having realised that her Ma had stopped talking some time back as blood, black and thick, came oozing out of her mouth at first before gushing out. But Sujata was surprised to find the turbulent look on her Ma’s face being replaced by something bordering on acceptance, calm and peace.
& & &
With her eyes finally shut for good, Namrata was thanking God for helping her accomplish her first good deed in life. Sujata will have no guilty feelings like she did. Namrata had taken that decision when the mother and daughter came out of the Doctor’s Chamber right after the detection of her cancer. She had decided to take the blame of Samir’s murder on herself so far as her lifeful of secrets was concerned. As far as the other secret was concerned, regarding the identity of her biological father, Namrata thought it best to let Sujata take Samir as her father for good.
* * * * THE END * * * *
Copyright Rathin Bhattacharjee 2026
Image Source: Lucian from Unsplash.com